So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
