Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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