doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
