Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize