I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
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