capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
this just has baby written all over it
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
