O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
