Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
