I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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