This girl is more easily done than said...
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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