Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I'm gonna fight the coyote
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
