Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
