Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
