I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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