so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I forget how to act sober
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
