It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Sorry about my life...
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
