(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
