No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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