I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
