I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
