We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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