In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
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Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you play pong handcuffed?
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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