Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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