i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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