What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I don't deserve a penis
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Im part way to drunk.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
