i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
