it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Randomize
