no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
