Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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