I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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