dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
