so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Actions speak louder than pants.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
