oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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