singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize
