Your tits are I can't wait for
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize