I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
its not stalking. its research.
Just cropdusted the office
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
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