i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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