i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
