I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
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