I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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