I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
