i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
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I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I will be naked everywhere
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
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I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.