but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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