She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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