OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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