I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
soo... how was my night?
Randomize