Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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