I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
