Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Randomize
