you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Randomize
