im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
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