It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
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